LOVE LOST: Ramatlhakolane and Setlhaga

A 30-year-old woman from Mochudi on Wednesday stood before court demanding that her boyfriend pays her P16 000 or eight head of cattle for breaking a marriage promise.
Telling her story to Kgosi John Pone of Mochudi Kgotla, Lemme Phaphasela Ramatlhakolane said she met Kebabonye Setlhaga, 37, the father of her six children in January 1997 and had their first child by the end of that year.
According to the jilted woman things seemed rosy until the birth of their last two children, a set of twins, in September last year.
She said soon after the birth Setlhaga disappeared and when they eventually spoke after some months he told her he had found another woman and was no longer interested in marrying her.
Ramatlhakolane said she realised Setlhaga’s change of mind was real when she paid him a visit in Khutshe where he was on a working trip and found him living with another woman.
“He looked me in the face and told me she was the woman he intended to marry. When I came back to Mochudi my parents contacted his parents about our problems, and got a rude shock when they were told Setlhaga had indeed found another woman.” She pointed out that her former boyfriend’s actions had left her with no alternative but to sue him for spoiling her matrimonial dreams.
However Setlhaga denied deserting the mother of his children saying that she had chased him away.
“She told me she no longer wanted me. You cannot expect me to marry a woman who is no longer interested in me,” he said, dismissing Ramatlhakolane’s allegations of a third party souring their relationship.
In his ruling Kgosi Pone said: “In Setswana culture when Patlo (the asking of the bride’s hand in marriage) has not been done, there is no promise of marriage.
“I will advise you to take this matter to the magistrate’s court and sue this man for maintenance so he can help you support the children. Children need to be looked after by both parents and I think the magistrate’s court can help in this regard. The customary court has no power to rule on matters of child maintenance,” he said.

Leave a Reply

Please Login to comment
10 Comment threads
0 Thread replies
Most reacted comment
Hottest comment thread
10 Comment authors
newest oldest most voted
Notify of

He is such a crook, how dare does one jilt his own flesh and blood? whatever happened to the joy of parenting? Some men should grow up. It old days culture for men to act as “kids”. So bad for kids, the most!


heela monna ke wena,waitse o tshamiketse ruri,o i thaya o re go jiwa heela


Yeah.they are right maintenance is the better route but le ene i blame her how can she have six kids in 13 yrs without being married.she should have stopped at two fa go thing she wil be leaving dem wit the grandmother.


Monyana le wena o smata blind, hw can u have so many kids with sum1 who hasnt married you. You should hav had 1 kid then told him to marry, use the strength of a woman aah.


Oa tshameka monna ke wena, o ka tshodisa motho beke le beke o bo ore gao mmatle. Bona jaaka o mo tsofaditse ebile a ntse dichubaba o batla gore a bonwe ke mang? O mosekise dear a duele bana bao, sisssssssss!


Legone ga a tlhabiwe ke ditlhong gore these kids when they grow up, they will know that he is a useless father and am sure gore le gone ko a ileng teng koo, o a go tshola gape. A nxaa batho

senana a siwe sepe mo lese tsamaye..le wena o worse borataro..lenna nka sia mo ke mokgweleo mma..gape le 37 ga ke bone o nanae..hathego seo mma se sule se ntse segologolo ke letsatsi la go ya court malatsi othe


Ao, nnana? O sure gore o ratile nnata yo tedu tsa gagwe ente tsa phoko yo? Le gale are o tla go boela.. otherwise mo ise ko Magistrate court for maintenance a tle a duele whatever amount yone eo * 6. a tle a bakele morobalo..

Le wena o berekise technology (condoms) o tla tsenwa ke AIDS..


Ijoo modimo wame tota rona women re bona mehlolo,tota ba mohuta yoo ithlela ekeye ba ka kgaolwa menoto ya maoto ka ke one a ba tsamaisang bobe,rra lefatshe le a fela change ur foolish attitude!!! otla kitla o bona kae gal ee ka go tsholelang bana ba ba kalo he o iketlile mfana.


Mo ise court a duele gogo aketsa are wa nyala le maintenance.Le wena one wa tshola phetelela monna.Ga go dirwe jalo mo malatsing a gompieno.Ngwana a tura soh!Ijo!Ithute go tima monna condom e seyo eseng jalo otla tsholela ruri kana o tsenwe ke malwetse.