Goblin terror

As politics continue to take centre stage following the announcement of the election date, residents of a high density suburb in Bulawayo are for now not in the least bit worried about who the next president will be.

What they need is a prophet or prophets who will rid their area of a goblin or goblins that are allegedly causing untold suffering and making life unbearable, especially for women who are reportedly sexually violated and sodomised on a daily basis.

While some may be quick to dismiss such stories as ‘ghetto myths’, residents of Cowdry Park have actually contributed money to pay whoever will catch the creature that has been terrorizing them for days.

According to reports in the local and social media, some prophets from Zion Church in South Africa came only to run away after receiving their fair share of the goblin’s wrath.

Residents who spoke to the local daily newspaper, Chronicle, narrated of how houses are stoned day and night with no sight of people throwing stones hence the belief that it could be the creatures from the ‘dark world’.

The goblin, which has since been named Maqobola (loosely meaning one who hits with an object), does not only pelt people with stones, according to one resident it also has a high libido.

“Every night the goblin(s) have sex with me. I can actually feel the penetration but cannot tell where it will be coming from. I have had to flee my house in the night to seek help,” claimed one woman.

What is interesting about this story is that in as much as witchcraft is not recognized in Zimbabwe, the thokolosi saga in Cowdry Park has generated so much interest and debate about whether such things really exist.

There are of course those who say witchcraft and goblins are a creation of one’s imagination while some are adamant that the world of evil certainly does exist.

In 2014, after former President Robert Mugabe had sacked his then deputy, Joice Mujuru, he accused her of being a witch, alleging that she was seen beheading a chicken while naked. According to Mugabe, this was meant to symbolise his beheading.

So you see, even those in power believe such things exist so we can’t really say Cowdry Park residents are hallucinating.

Anyway, now to politics. As you may already be aware that Mugabe was meant to appear before a parliamentary committee to answer questions with regards to the US$15 billion diamond revenue that was never accounted for.

Well he didn’t and it doesn’t look like he ever will.

According to the grapevine, cheeky Mugabe told the committee to stop bothering him and instead ask President Emmerson Mnangangwa, Vice President Constatino Chiwenga and the then mines Minister, Obert Minister.

If only the old man could appear before the committee and bare it all, things could really get interesting.