I worry they’re leaving me out

I worry they’re leaving me out


Dear Gase,

I’m a young guy with a small group of friends but I’m starting to question whether they really are my friends.

I never hear from them first. I always have to contact them and never get invited if they organise parties, trips away, or just meet up to hang out.

When I’m with them they’re fine and nice towards me and I’m not pushed out, even if I am on the outside of the group a lot.

I hate being left out but I’m too scared to say anything because I don’t want to force myself on them or be a nuisance.

I don’t understand why they wouldn’t want me to come, apart from the fact that I’m quite.

What can I do?

Gase says..

It doesn’t seem that they are leaving you out deliberately, but possibly because you are quiet they don’t think you’re bothered, or they might even forget about you because you don’t join in so much.

There’s nothing wrong with calling your friends and suggesting something – that’s not forcing yourself on them – and it sounds like you get along once you are out.

In any group there are the loud ones, the centre of attention, and the quiet ones like you.

I know where you coming from because I’m one of the quiet ones too.

I like sitting back and watching what’s going on and joining in when I want to.

Just be yourself and don’t try to act a part that doesn’t come naturally.

You could try being a bit more proactive and suggest things to do.

The more you do it the more confident you’ll become without having to pretend to be somebody you are not.

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