A 62-year-old Maun man was granted a divorce recently after he informed the court that he had not had sex with his wife in 20 years.
Whilst the average married man has sex twice a week, Karl Brink maintained that his wife had abandoned her duties.
He stunned the Francistown High Court when he revealed that he had not had his conjugal rights for two decades, and that his wife had not cleaned or cooked for him in the last 10 years.
Smartly dressed, the slightly hunched, bespectacled Brink strode purposefully to the witness stand to give evidence in his divorce case earlier this month.
A German national and former headmaster of a school in Maun, he explained that he came to Botswana in 1977 and met his wife in 1989.
He told the court that his relationship with Bonolo Sedima turned sour and was beyond repair due to his, “wife’s unreasonable behavior.”
Francistown High Court Judge Zibani Makhwade pointed out, “ I still believe in the institution of marriage,” and explained to Brink’s lawyer that his client would have to give specific reasons to convince the court that the marriage had completely broken down.
Explaining what he meant by ‘unreasonable behavior’ Brink said: “Since 1992 she has denied me conjugal rights, and has abandoned all her household duties for the past 10 years.
Five years ago she moved out of our family home to Bobonong and then Rakops without me knowing she had found a job.”
He went on to say: “I want a divorce especially because of the conjugal rights, but also because she has not been cooking for me, leaving me to do all the cooking.”
Brinke, who now has permanent residence status, told the court: “ We had three children together. My eldest daughter is 28, the second is 24 and the youngest is 21.
I stayed with Bonolo until 2008 when she moved out.”
The judge took only a few minutes to consider the evidence before asking if the couple had settled their estate.
Brink explained that although he was married out of community of property, he had agreed to sell a residential plot which they co owned in Maun and share the proceeds from the sale equally with his wife.
“We have both agreed that our matrimonial home be sold to the highest bidder,” he said.
The house was said to be worth in the region of P1 million.
Confirming that the matter was uncontested, Judge Makhwade granted the couple a divorce.
The process had taken 15 minutes, leaving Brink, who showed no emotion throughout the proceedings, free to love again.
WHAT IS THE AVERAGE SEX LIFE OF A MAN?
According to Mens Health Magazine, the average guy has sex about twice a week if he’s married—a little less often (once) if he’s single, a little more (three times) if he’s single but cohabitating.
The popular Men’s magazine goes on to advise: “If you’re not hitting your number, work on your approach.”
They point out that in a University of New Orleans study, nearly 70 percent of men reported that when they initiate sex, they overestimate their partners’ desire to get it on, most likely because they think women are like cookers: “Flick a switch and they get hot.”
As a final thought they suggest: “Talking to her—about work, family, the news—is the greatest aphrodisiac for a woman because it establishes a bond of sharing that she equates with romance. To you, it’s conversation. To her, it’s intimacy.”