Women with issues/ emotional baggage: if I was attracted to them before, when I catch a whiff of that intangible something, that shows her personality is slightly off balance.
(to put it mildly) a light bulb lights up in my head and I swear, It’s like she turns into a magnet, which I become unable to resist.
And I wonder,”why is that?”
Is it some innate urge to fix things? (I’m a mechanic, I like fixing things)
My childhood wasn’t the most healthy one.
So, Is it, “like is attracted to like?”
Or is it because, I’m not that normal either?
It’s called “White Knight Syndrome” which, while being noble, is unrealistic.
At the end of the day, people can only save themselves. Sure you can help with support, love and patience, but people have to want to be normal and healthy on their own.
Everyone has baggage, whether they admit it or not. But the real truth about a person lies in how they handle that baggage, again, your efforts are noble, but you cannot save anyone.
You can only save yourself. My advice to you is this, if you meet a woman who seems to be strong and emotionally well balanced and who is truly interested in being the best she can be (baggage and all) then stay and make the investment.
However, if you meet someone who relies solely on you to fix them you won’t be saving in anyone, including yourself.
All bad relationships tend to leave us with a bad taste in our mouths.
There’s nothing worse than being cheated on, or getting hit with a blindsided breakup that seemed to come out of left field.
While you’ve probably heard the phrase “it’s not you, it’s me,” now is a good time to reflect on whether your emotional and relationship baggage is in fact weighing you down (and it is you, not the other person).
Here are 6 signs that you have emotional relationship baggage.
After being burned, you are bound to feel and experience some lingering effects.
Maybe you aren’t as quick to jump into a relationship nowadays or maybe now it really takes a lot of effort and time before you really trust someone.
In any case, trust issues should dissipate over time.
If not, you’re more than likely still carrying around plenty of relationship baggage.
2. YOU COMPARE NOW TO THEN
This goes beyond a lack of trust and having doubts.
When you start comparing your now lover to a past lover, there is definitely something wrong.
Maybe your partner likes certain music or dresses a certain way, and these things automatically bring back bad memories and before you know it, you’re in a horrible mood that is tough to break. Don’t let unfortunate similarities break a possibly good relationship.
3.. YOU’RE AFRAID OF COMMITMENT
Commitment isn’t for everyone, but if you’re a woman who wants commitment, in your mind at least, you clearly aren’t fearful of it.
But, because of the past, you’re afraid of tying yourself down to one person, and you refuse to take that leap of faith, even if you’ve found a new guy who is great in all forms of the word. When you don’t want to be single but you’re afraid of commitment, it’s the relationship baggage holding you back.
Relationship baggage can cause all sorts of emotional and mental damage, including self-doubt. Since you’re already seeing the worst in yourself, you may also find that you’re seeing the worst in other people as well as in certain situations.
For example, you may feel like a guy you’re talking to is judging you harshly because of the lack of confidence and self-esteem you have.
This in turn makes you defensive and kind of ruins the relationship. Baggage and unfounded assumptions go hand-in-hand.
5 YOU PUT UP A LOT OF WALLS
As time goes on, walls can be brought down, but carrying a lot of relationship baggage makes these walls triple enforced.
In order to be able to enjoy a healthy relationship, you’ll have to be willing to let these walls down.
Keeping emotions and thoughts from your partner can quickly send a relationship into a downward spiral. Consider what you’ve been hiding from your partner, figure out why, and figure out a way to get it off your chest, once and for all.
6. YOU HAVE A BAD ATTITUDE ABOUT IT ALL
When it comes to dating and relationships, you really just hate thinking about all of it.
You’re sick of getting into relationships only to let yourself get hurt.
You’ve taken on the “hurt or get hurt” attitude and you’re not afraid to show it.
Bitterness after a breakup is expected, but don’t let bitterness turn into relationship baggage that lessens your chances of finding a real man.
LOOK OUT FOR WAYS TO FIX THIS PROBLEM FOR A BETTER RELATIONSHIP NEXT WEEK