A Voice reporter recently travelled on board Air Botswana from Johannesburg where she sat next to a middle aged white man who identified himself as Michael, the lover of Botswana’s biltong. With its never changing meal of biltong and peanuts, the national airliner made Michael’s trip an enjoyable one but the same could not be said for two other male passengers seated behind who expressed their disappointment the moment an air hostess served them the ‘usual’.
Floral shirt: (As soon as he gets his share of biltong and peanuts with raisings) Eish, kante when will Air Botswana change its menu, it’s just so predictable and boring.
Red golf t-shirt: Ya, it doesn’t matter whether you are flying locally or regionally, it’s just the same old segwapa (says with a lot of emphasis and both men laugh)
Floral shirt: And it’s also served for breakfast, lunch and dinner, these guys are really abusing their passengers. Wonder if their people are not ashamed to serve the same things all year round
Golf t-shirt: It’s because they don’t have local competition, wait till a new airliner comes into the scene, we will all run away from them and their peanuts (both men laugh)
Floral shirt: I have always wondered who won this big tender ya segwapa he must be a millionaire by now and am I sure he’s still yet to pocket some more money from this tender.
Michael: (Turns back to look at the two men) Guys, what are you on about, this is the best biltong in the universe (he says as he nibbles his share with a smile. In fact instead of having a packet of biltong and peanuts with raisings he asked for two packets of segwapa)
Golf shirt: It depends on how often you fly Air Botswana, too much of something isn’t nice at all.
Michael: If there is one thing that I look forward to when coming to Botswana, besides seeing my my dad of course is indulging myself in Botswana biltong, nothing compares to it, gosh I love it even more if it has some bit of fat, do you just love it? (he says turning to The Voice reporter with a smile while chewing a piece)
Voice Reporter: Ya its nice but it would be good to eat something different when flying Air Botswana.
Michael: Ah you guys are just the same, you don’t appreciate these wonderful pieces of meat, just like my ex-girlfriend who I dumped because she heavily criticized my biltong which had been sent by my dad.
Voice Reporter: You mean you broke up with your girlfriend over biltong?
Michael: Of course and I am not apologetic about it, my father (who is based in Gaborone) took the risk and sent me my favourite meat all the way to Manchester only for my girlfriend to think I am weird because I seem to be obsessed with what she calls weird meat, no one critcises my sumptuous biltong and gets away with it ( he says as he takes a closer look at the biltong with a smile before throwing it in his mouth. Just then the airhostess comes with drinks and he asks for another packet which was delivered to him a few minutes later)
Golf shirt: This guy is crazy, did you hear what he said, (asking the man in floral shirt) he’s saying he broke up with his girlfriend because she said segwapa is weird
Michael: I am not crazy man, and ya I broke up with the chik, how dare she calls my favourite meat of all times weird, and tell you what I think I am gonna marry my current girlfriend cause she loves the biltong as much as I do, I introduced it to her and now she’s in love with it more than she loves me, but anyway it’s not tough competition ( bursts into laughter and he’s joined by the other two men)
Continues: And I will be taking lots of it when I go back to the UK so my girlfriend and I can enjoy our other love.
Just then the captain announces that they are starting to descend towards Sir Seretse Khama Airport.
Michael: Gosh can’t wait to touch down my favourite country which produces the best beef and the best biltong in the universe. ( sits back and relaxes and the conversation comes to an end)