HE…My wife is tasteless and boring in bed
SHE…My husband said he would have to use 10 condoms to have sex with me
In a frank and revealing interview a Maun couple’s bitter conflict over their relationship exposes the pressures of living together when one partner has tested HIV positive. Dikhutsafalo Keese Ketshabamang from Shorobe ward revealed that the reason her husband, Samodimo Ketshabamang, 40, was accusing her of cheating was because of her recently discovered HIV positive status.
Ketshabamang, 30, claimed that things were fine until the day she tested HIV positive in 2009.
“My husband went berserk and started broadcasting to anyone who cared to listen to him that I was positive. He isolated himself from the family, refused to eat the food I cooked and bought himself a separate bath tub which he warned me not to use.”
She said that the straw that broke an already strained marriage was her husband’s comment that in order to have sex with her he would have to use ten condoms to prevent catching the HIV virus.
“Whenever we made love he would go off the rails and start ridiculing me and talking about how boring and tasteless I was in bed.
“He often compared my womanhood to a pool of water, saying that sleeping with me left him unsatisfied. He would then add that if he wanted water he would drink it because at least that would satisfy his thirst.”
Ketshabamang says she has since given up on her marriage, removed her wedding ring and filed for divorce in January this year. Samodimo has refused to test for HIV. For his part the angry husband dismissed his wife’s allegations as lies fabricated to defend herself against his charges of adultery with her Zimbabwean workmate and alleged boyfriend Nixon Maswera, 40.
Threatening to report Maswera for marriage wrecking, Samodimo said: “He used to drive my wife home after work and when I complained she told me that she had stopped. But my neighbours have informed me that they continued doing it behind my back.”
Samodimo, a plumber by trade said he then warned Maswera to distance himself from his wife, but the Zimbabwean told him to his face that he was not going to comply because the wife was his workmate and friend.
“To add insult to injury, Maswera transported my wife’s goods when she moved out of our matrimonial home by entering through a window.”
The man at the centre of the row however dismissed Samodimo as nothing but an alcoholic and abusive husband who was bitter because his wife was leaving him. “There is simply no truth behind what he told you. Our wives are friends and I help his wife with transport because he cares little about her. My hands are clean,” explained Maswera, who had the estranged couple’s car parked at his house at the time, apparently to carry out repairs.
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